Lore

Employee Spotlight: Ansley Jones

Our newest team member Ansley Jones comes with a long list of craftiness and cool experiences. When not making art out of wood/string/love, cruising around on her bike, photographing our beautiful city (and we don’t just mean Instagram – she has a Bachelor’s in Photography!), Ansley keeps busy as a front-end programmer and has jumped right into a serious mix of projects. She also makes wooden furniture and could teach a few fellas around here to sling a hammer (but I won’t name names). Unlike the rest of us schleps, Ansley earned her spot at Blue Ion by winning the presitigious (and inagural) Locked and Coded competitive scholarship in cohoots with the Iron Yard. Without further ado…

What are your nicknames?
Ansel, Ans, Answorth, Annie, etc. And Static Brain because I’m a little spacey

What would be the title of your autobiography?
Living with Static Brain

If you could have any super power, what would it be and why?
The power to undo embarrassing moments. Or teleportation: no more travel expenses and a smaller carbon footprint

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Would you rather be a tiny elephant or a giant hamster?
Tiny Elephant, 100%. Hamsters are creepy enough as their normal size.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
Spam sandwich. And I ate a dog-treat on a dare once, but that’s probably made of the same stuff.

If you were a cupcake, what flavor would you be?
I think I’d rather be a brownie. No nuts.

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What celebrity do people think you look like?
Ygritte from Game of Thrones.

(Editor’s Note: This is the happiest Ygritte has ever been. She just ate.)

When you were 6 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I definitely wanted to be in the circus. Maybe a trapeze artist…or anyone that gets to wear a big feather headdress and sparkly leotard.

What was your favorite toy as a child?
I didn’t have a favorite toy, but I had a least favorite toy and it was this talking baby doll that would turn on in the middle of the night and start talking from inside my closet. Demon doll!

What would you like to be famous for?
Directing an Oscar-winning movie

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What one food do you wish had zero calories?
Macaroni and cheese. Or duck-fat french fries from Tattooed Moose

If you were a Craylola crayon, what color would you be?
Macaroni and Cheese (it’s a real color)

What’s your Smurf name?
Ummm, I don’t know….Ginger Smurf?

If you could only drink one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Holy City Pluff Mud Porter

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What is your theme song?
Space Jam: the whole soundtrack

If your house was burning down, what’s the one thing you would save?
As much of the artwork on my walls as I could grab.

Which cartoon character would you most like to switch lives with?
Eliza Thornberry because I’ve always wanted a talking monkey sidekick. Or Bilbo Baggins from the animated Hobbit movie.

If you were on death row, what would your last meal be?
…I’m gonna go with macaroni and cheese.

If you were to write a self-help book, what would the topic be?
How to watch an entire television series in three days and not feel guilty about it.

If you could witness any historical event, what would you want to see?
I’d like to have been on set during the making of a Hitchcock movie. Maybe Rebecca or The Birds (Daphne du Maurier is the bomb)

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